What are ‘Lighthouse Parents’? The New Child-Rearing Style Parents are Supposed to Follow Now
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Parenting styles have evolved from “helicopter” and “bulldozer” parents to “tiger” and “jellyfish” parents, each with its own shortcomings. Trends like “crunchy moms,” “almond moms,” and “gentle parents” have emerged, reflecting various approaches to wellness and flexibility. Recently, “lighthouse parenting” has gained popularity, emphasizing stable guidance while allowing children the freedom to grow and learn, offering a balanced approach that avoids control.
The lighthouse method is a balanced approach to parenting that fosters emotionally healthy children and lifelong relationships with their parents, according to Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg in his upcoming book, Lighthouse Parenting: Raising Your Child With Loving Guidance for a Lifelong Bond, set for release in March 2025. Ginsburg describes lighthouse parents as stable forces that help children navigate challenges while allowing them to learn independence, ensuring they are prepared to face life’s difficulties.
Julie Romanowski, a Vancouver-based parenting coach, finds the lighthouse parenting style particularly resonant for both personal and professional reasons. She emphasizes that a lighthouse’s purpose is to guide, especially when children experience strong emotions. Romanowski describes this approach as sturdy, anchored, and peaceful. The rising popularity of lighthouse parenting may reflect a desire for balance between authoritative and gentle parenting, which is facing criticism for its pressures. Vanessa Lapointe, a psychologist, notes that this style avoids “safetyism,” allowing parents to be present while supporting their children’s developmental needs.
Vanessa Lapointe highlights that trends like lighthouse parenting can contribute to parental overwhelm due to the excessive and often conflicting information available online. With over a billion search results for “parenting,” many parents feel inundated, leading to feelings of inadequacy and increased online searches for guidance. A recent study indicated that parents who feel less in control are more likely to seek information, which can create a cycle of overwhelm. The U.S. surgeon general recently warned that many parents are feeling burned out from constant comparisons to online portrayals of parenting. Dr. Ashley Miller argues that parenting should not be treated as a fad or confined to specific trends, as this can add to stress.
Proponents of lighthouse parenting argue that it represents a balanced and effective approach to raising children, contrasting it with more trendy terms like helicopter parenting. Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg emphasizes that balanced parenting involves being loving and protective while preparing children to face challenges. The American Academy of Pediatrics has supported Ginsburg’s methods for fostering resilience and happiness in children.
However, Parents magazine notes that lighthouse parenting may not suit every family, as some children require more guidance. Dr. Ashley Miller highlights the importance of providing practical and emotional support to parents, rather than imposing narrow parenting styles. While many find lighthouse parenting appealing, experts like Julie Romanowski advise against feeling pressured to adopt it perfectly, as parenting trends are constantly evolving.
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