How Can you Help Your Child Learn to Self-Regulate?

Source:https://theconversation.com/

Self-regulation is the ability to manage thoughts and behaviors, crucial for achieving goals and maintaining relationships. It begins to develop between ages three and five. Research shows that effective self-regulation significantly impacts children’s short-term outcomes, such as making friends, engaging in school, and progressing academically.

Why is self-regulation important?

A child’s ability to self-regulate significantly influences their short-term outcomes, such as forming friendships, engaging in school, and making academic progress. Self-regulation helps children persist through challenges, manage their emotions, and stay focused on goals. For instance, a self-regulated child can wait their turn and follow game rules, while a child with low self-regulation may become frustrated and have meltdowns.

Additionally, poor self-regulation in early childhood can lead to long-term issues in adulthood, including gambling, substance abuse, and health problems. This capacity typically begins developing around age three, during a critical period of brain growth. Both genetics and environmental factors shape self-regulation, highlighting the important role of parents in fostering these skills.

Jumping in to ‘help’:

Parents often want to shield their children from difficulties, but this instinct can hinder their development. Children face challenges daily, such as opening a bottle or tying shoelaces, and parents may instinctively rush to solve these problems. However, allowing children to tackle these tasks fosters brain development by encouraging flexible thinking, problem-solving, and persistence. This ability to navigate challenges builds their confidence and self-sufficiency, ultimately reducing the likelihood of meltdowns over time.

What should parents do instead?

While it’s important to intervene in emergencies, parents can often allow children to navigate challenges on their own. For instance, if a child is struggling with a puzzle, parents should wait for them to ask for help or show frustration. Instead of directly intervening, parents can offer guidance through encouraging words, questions, and hints. For example, they might ask if the child has tried all the pieces or suggest looking back at previous successes. This approach helps children develop problem-solving skills while still feeling supported, as they remain the ones finding the solutions.

Step up your approach

If a child is still struggling with a task, parents can provide more hands-on guidance. For example, they might move puzzle pieces closer to the child to help them focus or directly hand them the piece they’re looking for. If the child is trying to fit a piece incorrectly, parents should return to verbal encouragement, suggesting they try turning the piece to see if it fits. This approach balances support with allowing the child to stay engaged in the task.

Kids are still in charge

The primary focus should be on letting the child guide how you assist them. Avoid intervening unless they ask for help, and don’t provide full support immediately. Start with encouragement, hints, and suggestions before moving to hands-on assistance. Allow the child to explore solutions on their own, recognizing that their problem-solving approach may differ from yours.

Read More: https://childreninfobank.com/safebank/how-can-you-help-your-child-learn-to-self-regulate/

Image Source:https://theconversation.com/