One Mom’s Simple Reality Check on Kids’ Behavior Might Be the Wake-up Call We All Need
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A mom on TikTok, Cassidy (@cassidychristinexo), shared a parenting “reality check” about the importance of connecting with children. She explained that when kids misbehave—lying, stealing, yelling, or talking back. It often stems from a lack of connection with their parents. Cassidy emphasized that busy daily routines can lead to neglecting these emotional connections, causing a significant strain on the parent-child relationship.
Cassidy, a mother who cares for her kids without childcare assistance, shares the reality of parenting. While juggling daily tasks like work, school, and bath time, she reminds parents that they signed up for all aspects of parenthood. Cassidy acknowledges how easy it is to get caught up in the busyness of life but emphasizes that parents must make time to build an authentic, meaningful connection with their children. She stresses that while not every day will be perfect, children need to feel that their parents are their biggest safe space.
Commenters Agree: Quality Time is Important
Cassidy’s no-nonsense parenting advice resonated with many viewers, who shared their own experiences. Several commenters noted that children with behavior problems often feel neglected, and others recognized how distractions like phone use can lead to misbehavior, with focused attention improving their children’s behavior. One person mentioned how taking their son on a date transformed his mood. While some acknowledged the challenges of parenting, especially for mothers who often bear disproportionate burdens, others highlighted the role of trauma and lack of connection in parenting struggles. A reminder was given that seeking professional support for trauma-related issues can be beneficial for both parents and children.
How to Create Space for Connection
Cassidy’s blunt message about the importance of connecting with children is supported by mental health experts. Emily Guarnotta, PsyD, emphasizes the value of quality family time, while therapist Abbey Sangmeister, MSEd, LPC, ACS, agrees that parents need to prioritize connection, even if it means adjusting their schedules. Sangmeister highlights that children need secure attachment with their parents to thrive physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially, and without this foundation, they may struggle in these areas.
Ditch the phone and pause notifications: Sangmeister refers to limiting phone use as “step one” in prioritizing connection with your kids. She explains that children often try to reach out but are blocked by their parents’ phones, which can lead them to either give up or misbehave for attention. To address this, she advises setting specific phone hours, with only rare exceptions, like waiting for important medical results, to ensure quality time with children.
Bring your kid with you on errands: Jenelle Thompson-Keene, a licensed counselor, suggests combining chores with quality time by involving your child in tasks like picking music or snacks for a road trip. She highlights that car rides can be a great opportunity for casual yet meaningful conversations with kids. Her bonus tip is to avoid overwhelming them with too many questions and to truly listen to what they have to say.
Cook meals together: If making dinner takes away from time with your child, consider involving them in the process. Thompson-Keene suggests asking your child for recipe ideas they’d like to try. For example, her nephew enjoys baking recipes from TikTok. You can also print and rate the recipes together to create a family cookbook.
Create white space: Dr. Guarnotta explains that “white space” refers to unstructured time spent together without a specific goal or purpose. She emphasizes that while parents often feel the need to be constantly doing something with their children, kids also benefit from simply hanging out, chatting, and bonding.
Have a ‘yes’ day: Dr. Guarnotta explains that “white space” refers to unstructured time spent together without a specific goal or purpose. She emphasizes that while parents often feel the need to be constantly doing something with their children, kids also benefit from simply hanging out, chatting, and bonding.
Look for stress signals: Ashley Mahoney, a licensed mental health counselor, explains that recognizing signs of stress in your child—such as anxiety, fatigue, irritability, emotional struggles, and physical symptoms—helps parents know when to step back and reconnect. She suggests that parents can improve bonding by saying “no” to non-essential activities, reducing screen time, and prioritizing rest for both themselves and their child.
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