7 Signs You’re an Elephant Parent

Source:https://www.parents.com/

Elephant parenting, inspired by the nurturing behavior of elephants, emphasizes a gentle and protective approach to raising children. This style focuses on building a strong, loving bond and prioritizes emotional support over academic achievements.

Developmental psychologist Tovah Klein notes that this method values emotional expression and regulation, which research links to better well-being and development. Daisy Vergara highlights that this trend aligns with growing attention to children’s emotional intelligence and mental health. Elephant parenting is particularly beneficial for parents who prioritize emotional connection and for families with neurodivergent children or those with heightened emotional needs.

Signs You’re an Elephant Parent

You’re nurturing: Elephant parents put substantial effort into making their home a warm and caring place. They take the time to connect with their children and offer comfort and emotional support, says Vergara.

You’re protective: Protecting kids from danger is the job of all parents, but it’s a central tenet of elephant parenting, as is making sure children feel safe. “Elephant parents are very concerned about the safety of their children and respond quickly if they see a threat” says Vergara.

Your kids are comfortable asking for help: Kids with elephant parents are often more inclined to feel comfortable asking for help and talking about their problems with the adults in their lives, because they know their parents will respond with understanding and support, Vergara explains.

You encourage emotional expression: Helping children regulate their big feelings is a big part of being an elephant parent. On top of that, elephant parents typically teach their children to recognize and express their emotions, says Vergara. This helps them become more emotionally intelligent and improve their social skills.

Your child views you as a safe place: Children of elephant parents know that they can come to their parents in response to both positive and negative events in their life without fear, says Fanciullo. Elephant parents aren’t there to yell, punish, or scold their children but rather guide them through challenging situations with compassion. 

You focus on exploration over achievement: In contrast to the tiger parent, elephant parents are less likely to focus on or pressure their children to do well academically or athletically, says Kate Elisha psychologist at Intermountain Primary Children’s Hospital whose work includes the behavioral health and development of children. While elephant parents still value academic achievement, they may instead prioritize “exploration and focus on independent learning and identity building,” says Elish. 

You emphasize flexibility and choice: Elephant parents may be apt to provide their children with increased opportunity for choice and flexibility in their daily routines and activities, says Elish. Elephant parents emphasize a sense of autonomy in their children, and rather than making decisions about what subjects they should study in school or what extracurricular activities they should take part in, elephant parents allow their kids to make those choices for themselves or explore many different interests before settling on one area.  

The Benefits of Elephant Parenting

While scientific studies have yet to be conducted on the impacts of elephant parenting, there is research detailing beneficial outcomes linked to some of the attributes encompassed by this parenting style. “Previous research has suggested a number of benefits from similar nurturing parenting styles,” says Elish. “Specific examples include enhanced emotional well-being, a stronger parent-child bond, increased resilience, and fostering of independence.”

Independence: Elephant parenting helps children form secure attachments. This in turn has been shown to be important for a child’s subsequent independence because it provides “the ‘secure base’ necessary to explore, learn and relate, and the wellbeing, motivation, and opportunity to do so,” according to one study. Secure attachments can also be the foundation they need to develop healthy relationships in adulthood too.

Prosocial behavior: An especially loving bond between parent and child early in life has been shown to “significantly increase the child’s tendency to be ‘prosocial’ and act with kindness and empathy towards others,” according to a study conducted by the University of Cambridge.⁵ The study also found children raised with these values also possess socially desirable behaviors such as helpfulness, generosity, and a desire to volunteer.

Improved mental health: People who experience warm and loving relationships with their parents from around age three tend to have fewer mental health problem according to the same University of Cambridge study.

Resilience: The supportive, stable and loving home life provided by elephant parenting helps children become more resilient and able to cope with difficulties and stress through healthy strategies.

The Drawbacks of Elephant Parenting

Elephant parenting, while nurturing, has potential drawbacks that should be considered. This style’s emphasis on emotional validation and flexibility can sometimes be mistaken for allowing children to set their own rules, potentially leading to permissiveness. It’s crucial to balance emotional support with gentle boundary setting.

Additionally, children might struggle with independence and problem-solving if they are overly sheltered. Excessive reliance on parental support can hinder their ability to develop their own identity and decision-making skills. There’s also a risk of sliding into helicopter parenting if parents become too involved.

Read More: https://childreninfobank.com/safebank/7-signs-youre-an-elephant-parent/

Image Source:https://www.parents.com/