8 Little Ways to Encourage Your Child to Speak Their Mind

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Teaching children to be assertive is a valuable life skill that can enhance their confidence and help them navigate various situations. According to Mia Rosenberg, LCSW, assertiveness enables children to express their needs, say no when necessary, and share important thoughts, all of which contribute to their overall strength and self-assurance.

Ways to Empower Your Child to Speak Their Mind

Let your child answer for themselves: Parents to allow their children to speak for themselves when interacting with adults, such as when a friend or server addresses them. While parents may instinctively answer for shy children to make things easier, behavior specialist Marcie Beigel emphasizes that letting children respond fosters confidence and highlights the importance of their voice. This practice encourages children to use their voice in different situations, helping them develop communication skills.

Carve out time for thoughtful discussions: Make time each day for meaningful conversations with your kids, whether during meals or on a walk. Dr. Beigel recommends engaging them with thoughtful questions like “Where did you learn that?” or “Tell me more,” to encourage deeper thinking. Rosenberg adds that asking open-ended questions, even when your child shows resistance, helps them reflect and open up. Instead of just agreeing with what they say, try asking probing questions like, “I wonder why…” or “I’ve noticed that…” to foster deeper discussion.

Try not to judge them: It’s important to avoid judgment when your child brings up difficult topics. Rosenberg explains that children carefully choose when to share sensitive subjects, and if they sense judgment, they may shut down. Parents should listen without being critical and avoid asking questions that could make the child defensive. If a child retracts their statement, give them space, and acknowledge that discussing certain things can be hard. This approach helps children feel validated and may encourage them to open up.

Give your child choices early on: Even small choices, like picking between strawberries or blueberries, can have a big impact on a child’s development. Kathryn Ely suggests that these decisions help young children practice speaking up for what they want. Offering your child more opportunities to make choices, both big and small, can help them become more comfortable expressing their feelings. For example, let your child choose the family dinner one or two nights a week, pick a weekend activity, or even help decide how the family will volunteer. These choices build confidence and decision-making skills.

Avoid labeling your child: Labeling children or categorizing them can harm their confidence and hinder their ability to find their own voice. Ely explains that children often internalize identities given by their parents, making it harder for them to express themselves. Parents should avoid comparing siblings or using labels like “the smart one” or “the funny one.” Instead, compliment specific actions, such as saying “that was smart” or “that was funny,” which encourages growth and helps children feel more open to change.

Model by example: Use everyday moments to model assertiveness for your child, such as politely getting someone’s attention, admitting when you’re wrong, or disagreeing respectfully. Rosenberg emphasizes that modeling by example helps children understand it’s okay to speak up without causing hurt feelings. For instance, you can show your child how to express a differing opinion while respecting others. Sharing personal experiences, especially when your child faces something similar, can be validating and help them feel understood. Discussing how you handled past situations and what you might have done differently also gives children confidence that they can overcome challenges too.

Help your child strengthen their opinions: Teach your child how to research their opinions using trusted sources. For example, if your child believes a vegetarian diet is best, you can research together from reliable websites and consult a doctor for an expert opinion. This process helps turn feelings into informed thoughts and boosts their assertiveness. Dr. Ritt-Olson explains that having evidence to support an opinion makes it more persuasive and encourages critical thinking. Developing these skills improves executive functioning, which is linked to better decision-making, achievement, and overall well-being.

Encourage change through actions: Discuss with your child how actions like volunteering and neighborhood cleanups can positively impact the community and the world. When kids participate in causes they care about, they learn the importance of taking action and making a difference. Dr. Ritt-Olson emphasizes that “opinions count,” and acting on them can create real change. Volunteering helps kids understand the power of their actions, and there are many ways children of all ages can contribute to their communities. To get started, explore ideas for kid-friendly volunteer opportunities.

Read More: https://childreninfobank.com/safebank/8-little-ways-to-encourage-your-child-to-speak-their-mind/

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